FullOfStitches.com blog.A good laugh leaves me in stitches!

“Your hands are full!”

“You’re braver than I am!”

“Better you than me!”

Well meaning people comment on other peoples family. Most, perhaps, out of surprise. But, sometimes belittling them, or worse, their children.

“There’s help for that.”
“Don’t you know where they come from yet?”
“They can fix that.”

Nothing’s broken. The natural, God-given appointment for most women is to bear children.

*1Tim 5:14 So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander.*

*Titus 2:3-5 3Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.*

The hardest thing I’ve ever done was to be a full time homebody. I was raised to seek “gainful” employment, to “contribute to society,” and ended up with a great dislike for most things domestic. Personally, I’ve always hated cleaning. It was a punishment. And, in a household of 7 people, cleaning was one of the few things you could do and end up alone. What a long way I’ve come, and still have to go!

After Ben and I married, we worked and paid for an adoption (Ben adopted TJ) and a wedding. We waited to have our second child through most of the adoption proceedings. Then, that Christmas, we stopped the pill. Within a month, we had conceived (now knowing the research, I wonder how conceiving so soon really affected my baby). We were offered the mini pill in UK after her birth, but my body reacted horribly to it, so we chose not to use anything. And, again looking at research, I can see it’s the healthiest choice. In His Word, having children is considered a blessing. They are gifts!

We have chosen to let the Lord bless us as He sees fit. Maybe He will close my womb – I’m willing to lay down my desire and allow Him to work on and through me in this way.

*But women will be saved through childbearing–if they continue in faith, love and holiness with propriety.
1 Timothy 2:15*

How right is Timothy! Most women of my generation do not leave school believing the scriptures, but many will take their children to church for the instruction, to be “good” children. In the process, they too can be ministered to and believe.

In my own life, I’ve found that verse applies on other levels. Having these blessings in my personal space from dawn to dawn and dusk to dusk brings out my impurities. My irritability can be changed to praise and thanksgiving for such blessings. My angry outlashes to songs of joy.

“You have way more patience than me!”

How? Through Christ alone.

Hebrews 12:2 Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

I was reading an article aloud yesterday about divorce from Above Rubies. The article pointed to the scripture where Jesus likens a man remarrying after divorce to adultery. My oldest daughter, MissA, asked me about TJ’s father, concerned that he may have committed adultery. What a sweet heart she has! I didn’t tell her the details of my divorce, just the obvious: he left, chose not to work on it, and I have no idea if he has remarried. And, I do forgive him his mistakes and what I thought to be trespasses against me. After all, how could one be unforgiving to the person God used to give such a sweet child as my TJ? I do hope he forgave me my pride (our last conversation all those years ago was civil).

I’ve learned much since then. I know that His grace is sufficient for me, and I could have extended that grace no matter the grievance. I was tired of the arguing, tired of the accusations that didn’t hold water. I bailed in the end, when in my weakness He could have been my strength.

Even so, the Good Lord has forgiven me and given me another chance. Before we wed, Ben and I decided that we would not divorce. No matter if we “drift apart” (a cop out for lack of taking the effort any more), or if we are kept apart – we’ve had years of being apart, sometimes a few days, the longest was nearly 5 months.

Marriage is not something to enter lightly. It is a commitment, a sacred vessel of the Lord Almighty to ensure a godly offspring.